hunting of the snark blog
hunting of the snark blog
I'm not usually down with the disclosure of embarrassing facts about myself, but you're obviously desperate (if not why would you want to know how to take revenge on your ex-girlfriend?) and, despite my usual snark, I am a caring girl.
Really.
So, since I know from experience a proven method to get revenge on your ex-girlfriend, I'm going to share an embarrassing story with you with me and my ex-small friend, "Mike".
How I became Ex-Girlfriend (or, Why I Screwed Up and Dumped My Boyfriend Loser)
Look, I'm a good person and I like to think that I can see beyond the superficial and material things to measure the content of a guy. So when I learned that my boyfriend had absolutely no fashion sense, I helped him buy clothes that looked good on him. When he lost his work, I helped him buy groceries and keep the phone connected. I even made sure that his car was still gassed up just in case it felt like another day of job hunting.
As I said, I am a good person.
However, there is only so much a girl can take.
Frankly, I reached a point where I was tired of dressing, pay bills and fill up – especially when I was not getting my tank filled back in, if you know what I mean. When he left his club gym and started packing to go on the weight was really the final straw. I told him then dumped. Plain and simple. I mean why not, but in retrospect, I certainly do not think through. If I could do it anywhere, I would give him more time to come on …
They Say Clothes Make the Man … … But I disagree. This he does not really makes the man.
A few months after I dumped my boyfriend, I fell on him and some of his friends to the beach and they have – literally – surrounded by women. In Actually, I could not even meet all if I was not curious to know what all the bikini-clad women were amazed at. I decided walking casually by and catch a glimpse, and you can imagine my surprise when I saw Mike at the center of it all.
If I so lucky I'm nice, I could make it back to my place to grab my bag and go to my car without me again Mike, but I am generally not much luck. Mike spotted me almost immediately and left the Circle of estrogen to come talk to me.
Even when there were about twenty feet between us and the women around him, I could tell things were different about Mike as he walked near me, I began highlighting the differences: it was larger, there was confidence in his stride, and he held his head high. More significant, however, was his body. I could tell it had been developed, but it was not bulky or cumbersome as the builders of the body to Instead, he had broad shoulders, his chest more defined, its small size …
He never looked that good all the time I knew him.
How I did it through this miserable ten-minute conversation without looking like a complete idiot, I'll never know. In Indeed, perhaps I did not look as such. At least I have sense enough left to ask him how he was, what he had been done – you know, all the usual chatter. Ultimately, Mike had landed a new job shortly after we broke up. He bought a new car moved in a very nice town, and started dating the blonde in red bikini, the circle of estrogen.
It was as if I was talking to someone completely different.
(And just in case you're wondering: Yes, he was kind enough to ask me all the same questions, but since I had not changed one iota since we had broken, my answers were not interesting.)
So how did Revenge Against his ex-girlfriend?
At this point, you're probably expecting me to say something like "Boy, I really learned my lesson – living well is the best revenge after all!" Of course … and after that, I can shoot rainbows and puppies of my ass too.
The fact is that I do not really care how he was alive. I do not care about his new ride or new clothes or new job to pay for it all. I did not even all his new "friends" (How could I blame them for being all over him?) Or the blonde.
What I was interested in what her shoulders. Its size. Above all, his chest. His chest news. His chest again that I was more than likely, will never be able to call "mine" again.
I still think.
That, my friends, is a proven method to get revenge on your ex-girlfriend.
Brooke Morgano is a former fitness instructor turned no-nonsense life coach who’s interested in helping people – men, especially – get off their butts and start caring about their health, relationships, and careers.
Learn more about the program she’s watched help thousands of guys get back on the right track – especially after bad relationships – at http://www.adoniseffect.com.
Luca’s Last Year (Luca in the Summertime: Episode 12)
